How much 'invisible work' are you doing each week?

Imagine if you were to outsource all the hours you spend working in the home. What is your time "off the clock" really worth?

Who's doing the most unpaid labour?

The people doing the most unpaid work are married women with dependent children, according to the Household, Income and Labour Dynamics in Australia (HILDA) survey — taken prior to the pandemic. They're also putting in the most hours in total, if you add together paid and unpaid work (75 total hours per week on average, compared with 73 for married fathers, and 71 for single mothers).

Here's how your unpaid load compares to the average married mother.

Once children enter the picture, unpaid labour jumps significantly. Married mothers with dependent kids are doing a whopping 40 hours more unpaid labour each week on average than single women with no kids, while married fathers are doing 15 hours more on average than childless bachelors.

Whether they're single, married or in a de facto partnership, mothers are performing substantially more unpaid labour than fathers (including single dads). But the gap is most pronounced among married couples with dependent children, where mothers are performing 26 hours more unpaid work each week on average than fathers.

This isn't just a case of mothers picking up more of the childcare while fathers take on more hours at work.

Even when both parents work full time, mothers are performing more unpaid work.

And the share of unpaid work that's done by women does not vary with wealth or education.

What about stay-at-home dads?

Stay-at-home mothers pick up 73 per cent of housework and 70 per cent of care. But flip the script and it's a different story — stay-at-home dads perform just 53 per cent of the housework and women are still doing half of the care.

Similarly, for childless couples where only the woman is working, she's still doing almost half (49 per cent) of the housework on top.

There is not a large enough sample size in the HILDA survey to determine the patterns in same-sex relationships. Other research suggests they divide unpaid labour more evenly, particularly female couples.

Australia's largest industry is invisible

Not that long ago, our households were split: One parent worked outside of the home, one cared for the kids and got dinner on the table, and a single income was enough to buy you a home in the suburbs.

Now, almost everyone works outside of the home. But all that domestic work? It didn't disappear with the death of the housewife.

Without unpaid labour, our economy wouldn't function, yet we don't count it in our national accounting. If we did, it'd be equivalent to 50-60 per cent of Australia's GDP, according to one ABS estimate. 

Unpaid child care would be Australia's largest industry, larger than any in the formal economy, with three-quarters of it performed by women, according to PWC analysis.

But the invisible nature of unpaid work means people rarely quantify their total work week.

"If you add up all the hours I spend looking after children, in paid employment (25 hours) and cleaning and cooking, it would be close to 70 hours a week," one mother wrote to ABC News. 

"Despite asking for things to be fairer at home, I am told by my husband, 'But I'm the worker.' 

"It's about time spent, not the number of dollars earned or tasks achieved. A unit of time is as valuable to me as it is to my husband." 

'Motherhood penalty' never goes away

So, what happens when 64 per cent of a woman's work week is unpaid, while for men it's just 36 per cent?

That's the equivalent of having a full-time job where you're only paid until 3pm on Tuesday. 

"It's not just that women aren't being compensated for their work in the home," says University of Melbourne expert Leah Ruppanner.

"It also takes them out of paid employment, which compromises career and salary progression and, of course, superannuation savings."

For many couples, it makes financial sense for the father to take on more paid hours as his salary is typically higher. But in practice, that can cap how much the mother will earn forever after.

"I work part time in the same department as my husband, who works full time," one mother told the ABC.

"We have three children, the youngest is still breastfeeding. As he has moved up the career ladder, I feel that I have moved down it in order to manage the kids and household."

For some women, this can be financially devastating if the relationship ends in divorce.

"With three children, I worked hard for 19 years while my husband saved 2.5 times as much superannuation," one mother wrote to ABC News.

"Three years after the end of our marriage, we are still going through the family court, in which our combined outgoings on lawyers has been more than all of my superannuation saved over 22 years.

"It seems now that I can't get out of these proceedings unless I am completely and totally financially crushed." 

My husband works 24/7 and I am in charge of everything else — a four-person household with a dog and a garden. I am the cleaner, the cook, the laundry woman, the nanny, the gardener, the secretary, the driver, the dog walker.

Yet, how often have I heard the comment: "Oh, you don't have a job? So what do you do all day long?" One of my husband's colleagues even said to me: "You should meet my wife, she does nothing, like you."

It seems since nowadays most couples both have a full-time job, there is absolutely nothing to do in the household anymore, the work at home has magically disappeared. — Anonymous (woman)

My husband used to joke about mummy and daddy jobs. Funnily enough, daddy jobs happen only occasionally (like the lawns) whereas mummy jobs are an all-day grind. Just to keep my head above water I am up at 5am every day and the last to bed at 11pm. I am not happy with being a modern woman. I was told I could work and have a family but no-one said, "By the way, society hasn't told men they have to help." If I fell asleep on the couch when I came home from work or just turned on the telly I'd be the worst parent ever! — Anonymous (woman)

I have been a stay-at-home mum for the last two years and it is tough as my husband has decided every single home and kids decision is up to me. It often makes me feel a bit like a single parent and he is just sponsoring our existence. He will often make comments about me doing nothing and how busy he is. All I crave is for my work to be appreciated as work, and as sometimes challenging, and also on the flipside so brain-numbingly mundane. I love spending this precious time with the kids — I would just like to feel less isolated. — Anonymous (woman)

Both my partner and I work full time. We share the responsibilities of dropping off and picking up our two children and roughly share the housework. From the start of parenthood, we were determined to both care for our children, however there's still a clear imbalance in the emotional labour of our household. My partner does the majority of social planning, gift buying, financial management and meal planning, so we've still got a long way to go before I could say it's an even split. — Anonymous (man)

I earn the majority of the income yet I often work late nights while my family sleeps to keep on top of it all and I find myself wondering how fighting for the "right to do anything" became "getting lumped with doing everything". Without my partner, I'd have to hire a gardener and the odd tradesman. Without me, he'd need a bookkeeper, PA, nanny, a cook and a cleaner. I've tried more negotiations, lists and plans than you can imagine but none stick. Ladies, I think we've been duped. Men, we're not OK with it. — Anonymous (woman)

To be honest, my wife still does more than me, but her paid work is three days a week and mine is five, so she is around a lot more. But we also approach household load differently. She will go all out on a kid's birthday whereas I approach it more simply and thus with less work. She says I always take the easy way out and I say she complicates things more than she needs to. Another example is she includes social networking in the household load but I treat it as an optional extra; if I am busy I don't socialise. My wife tries to do everything, every day. I tend to prioritise things a little more harshly whereas she will just burn out. — Dave

Before we married, my husband lived by himself and managed to make the bed, cook, etc. I do not want this inequality for my daughters and they have said they don't want to work as adults because of all the housework to do as well. — Anonymous (woman)

Before having our first child, my husband and I engaged a cleaning service and shared other household tasks. When I became a stay-at-home mother, I took over responsibility for all "inside" household chores because we deemed a cleaner a luxury on only one income. I get quite down about it at times, as it is a never-ending cycle. Previously I worked as a lawyer and was highly paid so it is a big adjustment. — Keera

Before I returned to full-time study, my wife and I both worked full time. My perceptions of who should be doing what were quite outdated then, with the belief that the woman should cook (regardless of hours worked). Going back to school completely changed that and now I'm proud to say that there is a noticeable change in household chores, where I do the majority of cooking and cleaning because of the hours she devotes to her job and that's even after I returned to work. — Joshua

Prior to the birth of our children, my husband contributed a lot more to household chores. Once I went on parental leave, however, almost all of the household chores ended up becoming my responsibility. Unfortunately it has been very difficult to shift those expectations now that I am back at work. We have had many conversations which result in things being more even for a week or two. My biggest pet hate is when my husband expects me to thank him for helping out. Asking for thanks implies he's doing me a favour but really it's his responsibility too. — Anonymous (woman)

I'm 24 and live in a household with my mother and two adult brothers (19 and 21). Since my mother had surgery in May of 2019, we have had minimal support from my brothers. Mum ends up doing chores she shouldn't be doing and hurting herself. Some steps I've taken include writing out a chore schedule, yelling, pleading, charging them if they don't do their chores (the proceeds go towards a professional cleaning service), and a number of other methods that I've blocked from memory because they were so fruitless. I'm at a loss! — Jessica

Ten years ago I arranged a mediation for my ex and I to sort through property settlement with the "very mature-age" divorce. My ex had no qualms extolling that I didn't work for 10 years of the 40-year marriage and just "sat around and had hen's parties with my girlfriends". The mediators questioned whether, in fact, this was when the three children were born and raised, and of course it was. The mediators pointed out that child raising was a legitimate job, just an unpaid one. — Anonymous (woman)

I have an amazing partner but women shouldn't have to compromise and sacrifice their lives in this way. When my home isn't clean and running smoothly, I feel the guilt that's been so ingrained in me (and every woman) that it's our shame and failure. But when I do more than my half of the housework, I feel the feminist guilt — that I'm perpetuating this inequality and letting my male partner get away with using me as a free maid service. — Anonymous (woman)

My husband asks me questions like "where are our children?" when he gets home. Ahh yep, that would be the same place they visited for the past two years and it actually has a name like after-school sport, part-time work, etc. I often ask him why I can keep track. His response is that as the mother "I am good at it". As a 49-year-old woman I feel in the middle of both old and new-school ways of thinking — on one hand saying I'm a feminist while making a rod for my own back. If anyone did anything to my 18-year-old daughter I would fire up a treat, but it seems OK for me to be treated like this. — Anonymous (woman)

I have an enviable position — the household load is split about 90/10 in my favour. I work full time and my partner cares for our children and studies. Despite this working for our family reasonably well, I still feel a great deal of guilt about not contributing more. This could be a classic case of 'PC' gone too far, the pendulum has swung too far the other way! And a tiny part of my brain also suspects that my working full time and my partner picking up "the rest" validates all the excuses men have always given for why they don't do more. It's simply easier if we each own our domains. Then again, even if that is true — why aren't more men choosing this option? — Anonymous (woman)

We asked how you manage unpaid work in your household

The upshot? A 'recipe for divorce'

As soon as a woman lives with a male partner, the hours she spends on housework dramatically increase, outpacing any increase the man sees. And that gap becomes a chasm once kids land — a pattern often formed during maternity leave.

Even when couples have managed to split chores and school pick-ups evenly, the "mental load" — the work of planning, managing, remembering and delegating in the household — disproportionately falls to women, leaving them burnt out and with less mental space for paid work, according to Dr Ruppanner.

Against this backdrop, a stack of dirty dishes can break a relationship — as Dr Ruppanner's research has tracked. 

"We studied Swedish couples and, where one partner did more housework, they reported worse relationship satisfaction," says Dr Ruppanner.

"It's not just about the amount of work you do but whether the other partner is acknowledging and valuing the work. 

"Couples where both partners thought they were doing all the work had worse relationship satisfaction and were way more likely to split."

Dr Ruppanner found a similar pattern with Canadian parents: Where women felt trapped in their domestic work, relationships suffered.

"The data shows consistently that not only are women doing more, they're doing more of the less pleasurable tasks, both in housework and child care," Dr Ruppanner says. 

"Men step into the fun and rewarding components but women are picking up what's left.

"That's a recipe for divorce."

For my husband, leaving dirty plates on the side of the sink wasn't hurting anybody because he would "get around to it later". Inevitably, I'd always get there first (while mentally adding a grievance against him!). He hadn't realised that his "saving 10 seconds" every time was just transferring that time into my domestic workload. Once I explained that point of view, he changed his habits. It's not worth sacrificing your relationship over an unwashed plate, but a lack of communication and compromise can definitely lead to that happening. — Molly

My partner and I both have full-time jobs but she has immunodeficiencies and a chronic disease so energy levels are very low. It's tough. I do 99 per cent of the meals and shopping and clean up afterwards and I make everyone's lunches each day. We have five acres and lots of pets so I also do outside chores and home maintenance. Our kids are getting older now but they fight every step of the way to do chores. Bringing up the subject of help and equity starts fights. It's easier just to do the job without the extra hassle. — Anonymous (man)

In my first marriage, my wife told me permanently how lazy I am and what she's doing and consequently I'm not doing. After our marriage breakdown I made a simple rule for my future. Nobody else, except myself, will be allowed to do cooking, cleaning, etc in my household. Now, almost 10 years into a really happy relationship, it still works perfectly. The house is spotless, the ironing is in the wardrobe and the variety of our cooked meals marvellous. — Anonymous (man)

On a weekday, the only thing my husband has to do is go to work. I also work full time but I work from home. I feel like his attitude is that because I'm not leaving the house I'm also able to take care of all the laundry, cleaning, meal planning, grocery shopping, cooking, etc. There's plenty of time before and after work when he could make my life a bit easier. "But I'm so tired when I get home!" No worries, just plonk down on the sofa, enjoy the home that I keep clean and I'll bring you a delicious and nutritious meal which I planned, shopped for and prepared. And he wonders why I'm asleep at 9pm and have no interest in sex. — Anonymous (woman)

I was a house husband for eight years to our two sons. It allowed my wife to develop her career as a medical specialist. The work was unremitting but incredibly rewarding. However, while my wife gained a worldwide reputation in her field, she was less forgiving if housework was not done to her expectations. She eventually told me I wasn't a good parent, not a good husband and especially not good enough at housework. She wanted a divorce. I felt stunned and had a sudden realisation that this was what women have felt for years when they have been cast aside by a husband who had lost perspective of the work involved at home. — Stuart

My husband and I both work and when our daughter was young I was always the one who took her to and from school and all of her activities. My husband made up for this by taking on far more of the household chores than I did. Our daughter is now a young adult and there is much less onus on me to do things for her. However, we haven't redressed the balance of who does how much cooking and cleaning. How do I feel about that? Guilty. — Anonymous (woman)

I run a small business from home, my wife is a yoga studio manager and spends most of her time working, seven days a week. I do the cooking, the cleaning, dog walking, the washing, pretty much everything. I grew up in a poor family, did a chef's apprenticeship and had a strict stepmother who taught me how to clean. My wife was brought up in a middle-class English household with a stay-at-home mum who did everything for her children. I'm often frustrated at her lack of attention to this. Anonymous (man)

We both work full time and have three kids. I do everything inside the house and he does everything outside. I am still baffled as to how this happened. His lack of input into the gruelling, mind-numbing, never-ending daily grind of cooking, cleaning, washing, folding, planning, playing, grooming, listening, admonishing, supporting, driving, thinking, foreshadowing, researching and reflecting results in a complete disconnect with the family and his role in it. Am I bitter? Yep! — Anonymous (woman)

I should have known — when we were having a long-distance relationship, the sheets I washed at her place would still be on the line two weeks later when I revisited. When asked how she managed it, she glibly responded "I just lay on the other side!" We have been together 17 years and in that time I don't think she has stripped the bed once. We don't share the load, we just get in and do the things we think important and argue about the ones neither of us like. — Anonymous (man)

I come from Indian culture where it is taken for granted that the wife does all domestic work even when she is working full time. My household load is split according to my husband's mood. If he is happy, he does it all. If he is grumpy then this affects his behaviour at home. I would love to get help from others who have innovative ideas to deal with this kind of situation. — Anonymous (woman)

For the second time in four years, I've taken time off work to stay at home with my child. I pretty much do everything around the house. I'm not complaining, it's a small sacrifice now in my career so she can advance hers (which is needed after close to 18 years of study and work). I feel mostly tired and jaded/pissed off, but that's the reality — she needs to study to pass her exams. There is no "evening up the workload", just cop it on the chin, keep calm and carry on. — Daniel

I feel I've become a slave to my home and the chores that come with it. I never wanted to do the whole "housewife" thing but that's what I'm stuck with now. We're lucky our marriage is still holding together, I can't imagine trying to add a chores roster into the mix. Two adults trying to manage a household and children alone no longer makes sense to me. Society's expectations went wrong somewhere along the way for us to end up here. — Anonymous (woman)

My wife does most of the housework. It's not like I don't want to, it's more like she doesn't want me to — I don't make the bed correctly, I don't vacuum the floor right, I fold the tea towel inside out, I put too much laundry powder in a washing machine, I don't wash the dishes in the right order, the water isn't hot enough, I don't hang up the clothes correctly, don't stick the washing machine on unless I say so. But she'll still moan that she does all of the work. I edge and mow the lawns, fix and glue breakages including the car and kids' toys. Get the blame for breaking anything. — Tim

I would say I do about 90 per cent of the housework though I work just as many hours as my husband. It makes me feel unloved and that I'm not important and it does not help my mental health. I've taken to getting my two children (six and four) to do the things they can do, like packing their own lunches, to lighten the load. — Sharra

I am too tired and resentful to even share as a mum of three including a new baby with a husband who works more than ever. Men need to understand I am home with the kids to look after them, not to housekeep — it's a completely separate role. As a keen feminist I have woken up one day being pumped with all the things I never wanted. His response was to hire a cleaner, then he complained about the cost, their lack of detail, yet most of the time instead of cleaning they were picking up his shit. He also can't comprehend cleaning and tidying are different. Sorry to rant. — Anonymous (woman)

We asked how you manage unpaid work in your household.

A public solution to private tensions?

How do you solve a problem like the household load, that's mostly negotiated over the kitchen table?

On the University of Melbourne podcast Women are the Business, Dr Ruppanner encourages women to stave off a dirty-dish divorce by going on a "chore strike".

"A chore strike will make all the invisible work visible. Then families can figure out which of that work is essential and which is being done because of social pressure to have a Marie Kondo-ed house. 

"Then you can reallocate those essential tasks more evenly."

I am going overseas for a 10-day work trip. I am going to leave with nothing in the fridge or pantry and a hamper full of dirty washing and I'm even hoarding kids' school notes so they can wave them at him at the absolute last minute when he needs to leave for work and doesn't have the cash to give them the excursion bus fare! I've secretly taught my kids a couple of dinner tricks in case they are starving! The cars will have no fuel. The guinea pig cage will reek! BONANZA! I just hope the coronavirus holds out because I might not get another chance to even the load for a while. — Anonymous (woman)

After a visit to check out robot vacuum cleaners, listening to the male shop assistant and my partner wax lyrical about how best to clean floors, I announced that I had obviously been getting it wrong for all these years and I'd let my partner do it in future. So began my cleaning strike. Twelve months on, we have a lovely team of cleaners and voilà it's done. My partner occasionally complains that they're not doing as thorough a job as "we" would have. I just smile and get back to my hobbies. It's the first time in my 64-year-old life I've been free of domestic duties. — Anonymous (woman)

My husband had been the stay-at-home parent for three years while I worked but was reluctant to cook the evening meal as he was very tired and busy with his own projects. Besides, the children should "know what mothers do". I would struggle to get home in time to cook, bathe the children and put them to bed only to find they began to complain they weren't hungry. It turned out that the children were given lunch sometimes within half an hour of my arrival from work. I cried and swore that he would now cook all meals during the week. He prepares the majority of the evening meals to this day and I remain the breadwinner. — Janet

The workload is all mine. The only time my husband actually did the "girl jobs" was when I was posted overseas and he had to fend for himself. I now refuse to clean up after him. If he soils the bathroom, he has to clean it. The age of him being an only child with women having to care for his every need is over. Bugger that. — Sue

Last year, when I was working, doing all the running around and all the household chores, I had an epiphany — I couldn't do it all. When the good old chore chart didn't work, I simply went on strike for four days and when there was no food left in the cupboard and no clean undies, everyone got the message. The routine is now divided and tidying is a communal effort and a game — it is timed and whatever is not picked up in that time will go in the bin! It is a happier household! — Anonymous (woman)

ABC readers share their experience of a "chore strike".

Dr Ruppanner also encourages men to top up their partners' superannuation with spousal contributions if they are swapping paid work for unpaid labour at home.

But Marie Coleman, founding member of the National Foundation for Australian Women, says the structural problem of unpaid labour can't be left to couples to solve.

Feminist proposals like "a wage for housewives" have been dismissed over the decades as "the government paying you to do your dishes". But there are practical things the state can do — and in many countries does do.

Parental leave is key

The uneven distribution of unpaid labour often emerges during maternity leave, when women are spending more time in the home, and for many women this pattern remains after they return to the office.

Extending parental leave to both parents can give both partners a realistic understanding of the hours involved in childrearing and establish a fair distribution from the outset.

Ms Coleman says the government's paid parental leave should match parents' salaries to encourage more men to use it.

"As long as men are being paid less on parental leave than their wages, it's going to be very hard to convince them that they should take time out to look after kids," she says.

"So the wage gap flows through into who's going to do school pick-ups and who's going to go do the shopping."

My partner and I shared the allocation of parental leave. We committed to both getting up every time our daughter needed a feed in the night. One of us did chores while the other fed, changed or calmed the baby. Our house never looked so clean. My husband often had colleagues or male friends telling him to encourage me to breastfeed longer so that he didn't have to do anything in the night. Avoiding this mentality brought us such friendship and partnership that it ultimately made this easier when talking about the dishes, laundry and dinner. — Alice

People like to remind me how "lucky" I am that I have a "hands-on" husband and gush over what a great dad he is. Yeah, he is great. But he doesn't deserve a medal for pulling his weight at home and caring for his own kids and he knows that. We are lucky in that his employer provides generous paid parental leave for dads as well as mums. Each of us taking a period of parental leave means we both have an appreciation for what a grind it is being at home scraping food off the floor, but also that it's hard to be the person juggling work and domestic responsibilities. — Eve

I've been a driver, done tree work, even some time in the military, but the best job was tea parties with my angel daughter, school runs and being with my children as they grow. I cook meals, clean the house and am happy in the garden. My wife works and organises the bills. Great deal for me. I'm a stay-at-home dad and proud of it. — Anonymous (man)

My husband is now the stay-at-home parent, including caring for our special-needs son. He can't believe how much work it is and it took a long time for him to be OK with this change in his "identity". But he knows what a privilege it is to be at home with the kids. Every couple needs a role reversal to understand that parenting and partnerships is about giving 100 per cent each, and when you can't, the other is there to support unconditionally. We want to teach our sons that nothing is gendered but everyone takes a degree of responsibility for the functioning of our blissful home! — Anonymous (woman)

Before I went on maternity leave my partner pictured me at home watching Ellen on TV, having coffee with friends, down at the beach daily, et cetera. When our daughter arrived, he realised how far from the truth that was. So he declared that I was no longer on any kind of household duties. My "job" was purely to tend to every need of my daughter. We also agreed to forfeit some of our spending money and invest in a fortnightly cleaner so we can enjoy this first year of our daughter's life, as we realised quickly we won't get these moments back. — Brooke

My wife and I split the working week. I've learnt that it's much harder staying home with my daughters than building houses, but far more rewarding being home. We both stay relevant in our industries and both contribute on all levels. — Tom

I have a seven-month-old baby and it has been challenging to feel like we're sharing the workload equally. I've realised that nagging has been counterproductive and only served to stress us both. Instead I've come up with a to-do list so he can identify what still needs to be done when he arrives home from work. It's not a perfect solution but we're in a happier place. I can't wait for when I'm back at work and he's on paternity leave. I am excited for him to learn to be organised enough to take care of housework and the baby! — Anonymous (woman)

Parental leave can make or break how couples divide unpaid work.

Share the burden by outsourcing care

In Sweden, free or heavily subsidised child and elder care have helped bring more women into the workforce than in any other country. And while Swedish housework is still gendered, the gap in unpaid hours per day is the narrowest among OECD countries.

Ms Coleman says the amount of unpaid labour that Australian women are doing is partly due to the prohibitive cost of child care.

"We are spending a tremendous amount subsidising child care in Australia yet we see low satisfaction when compared with primary schools," says Ms Coleman.

"I think we need to evaluate whether we're getting bang for buck or whether government subsidies are being syphoned off as profit in this privatised system."

For Dr Ruppanner, the ageing population is a looming catastrophe for women, who already do more care for elderly relatives: "We need to acknowledge that caregiving isn't just for parents of young children." 

Dr Ruppanner suggests a flexible welfare payment that allows families to outsource care or housework, similar to what some tech companies in the US are offering employees.

"Women would be freed-up for paid employment and that would come back to the government through income tax."

There are further steps government could take to make outsourcing cheaper, like waiving GST for companies providing domestic services or reducing "red tape" for childcare centres. 

Unpaid work attracts no super

Perhaps the biggest challenge is that superannuation is tied to paid work, meaning women retire with around half as much superannuation as men. This is one of the reasons older, single women are the fastest-growing group of Australians experiencing homelessness.

"We have a moral obligation to not leave women who devoted their lives to raising families destitute," says Dr Ruppanner.

"We will ultimately pick up the tab for these women through the pension, the healthcare system, public housing and the like, so why not pre-empt that and give women some financial independence in the process?"

Government urged to take the lead

There's plenty that employers could offer beyond parental leave, such as flexible working arrangements that allow both parents to share caring responsibilities, or subsidising child care.

But, as Ms Coleman points out, most Australians work outside of large companies: "Your local corner store sure doesn't have an HR department." A quarter of working women and just over a fifth of working men are casuals, with no entitlements like parental or carer's leave.

For this reason, Dr Ruppanner and Ms Coleman think government, not industry, must lead the way. 

"Solving this is not just about people having cleaner benches and toilets in their home," says Dr Ruppanner.

"Treating unpaid labour as real work can help women into the labour market, buy them more leisure time and allow men to be more actively involved in their children's lives. 

"Then you end up with happier men workers too and happier couples — what's not to love?"

Credits

Reporter and producer: Annika Blau

Designer: Ben Spraggon

Illustrator: Emma Machan

Developer: Colin Gourlay

Editors: Matt Liddy and Cristen Tilley

About the data:

• The hours per week that various demographics spend on unpaid work and paid employment comes from the Household, Income and Labour Dynamics in Australia Survey: Selected Findings from Waves 1 to 16. The figures can be found in Table 5.3, and represent the mean hours for persons aged 15 to 64, 2002 to 2016 (pooled).   
• The value of your unpaid labour is calculated using an hourly rate of $31.37. Deloitte Access Economics determined average hourly rates for housework and care in the labour market through an analysis of ABS data (Figure 3.2). We took an average of these 2016 rates and adjusted it for wage growth using the Wage Price Index.
• The charts comparing the breakdown of housework and care for different couple configurations (both parents working full time; stay-at-home dad; stay-at-home mum) use data from Household, Income and Labour Dynamics in Australia Survey: Selected Findings from Waves 1 to 16 (Figure 5.4).
• The chart comparing what proportion of men and women’s total hours are paid comes from the Workplace Gender Equality Agency.
• The chart comparing Australia against other countries uses OECD data — Employment: Time spent in paid and unpaid work, by sex.